Partners of breastfeeding moms always want to know what they can do to support breastfeeding. I commonly hear things like, “I’m planning on letting mom sleep all night, and I’ll get up and feed the baby a bottle”. While this sounds like a great idea, it’s really not, and here’s why: Breastmilk production is directly related to nipple stimulation and removal of milk (either through nursing or through pumping/hand expression). When milk is not frequently removed, the breast gets full and pressure on the milk-making cells tells the breast to slow down production. This is not great, especially during the initial 4-6 weeks when the breasts are trying to regulate supply according to baby’s needs.
So what can dad’s and partners of breastfeeding mom’s do to help support breastfeeding? Actually, it turns out, they can do a LOT! Here are 6 ways partners can be helpful.
- Be knowledgeable: The number one best thing partners of breastfeeding moms can do is be knowledgeable. Knowledge is power! Taking an interest and being a second set of ears and eyes will help tremendously. This way the partner can say things like, “remember when they said to try ______?” Taking a class together would be a perfect way to become knowledgeable.
3. Run interference: New families are often bombarded with visitors. These well-meaning visitors often don’t realize that they may be delaying feeds or interfering with mom’s ability to get some much needed rest. Often times, new moms are uncomfortable with breastfeeding in front of company. Both mom and babe are just trying to figure things out, and they don’t need an audience. Because of this, some moms will resort to bottle feeding while company is around, and in turn may cause more frustration with breastfeeding. Partners can place notes on hospital doors, turn off cell phones, or field phone calls in order to minimize disruptions. At the hospital, you can always ask the nursing staff to assist with this as well.
4. Be helpful: It often takes mom and babe some time to figure out a good latch and for nursing to become easy. Moms often feel chained to the couch or a chair for many hours a day in the beginning, especially while cluster feeding is happening. Partners can help take care of baby by taking care of mom. See if she needs anything such as a drink, food/snacks, more pillows, the TV remote/computer/phone, or if she needs help with getting baby latched. Night time feeds are especially hard. Partners can help by responding to babe when they awaken, changing baby’s diaper and taking babe to mom. Partners may also offer to stay awake during those lonely night time feeds. This often helps mom feel like “we’re in this together”.
5. Squash criticism: Believe it or not, breastfeeding moms often receive a lot of criticism whether it be from complete strangers or family and friends. Sometimes people don’t even realize their comments may be detrimental. Things like introducing bottles, whether or not a babe is receiving enough milk, and nursing in public often elicit comments that may make mom question what she knows. Having someone “who has her back” and will shut down any negative comments is a critical component to success.
6. Bond with baby: There are many ways for dads and partners to bond with baby other than through feeds. Bath time is a great way to bond. Other ways are through skin-to-skin contact, dressing babe, changing diapers, taking walks, and even reading books (no, it’s never too early to start reading to your baby!)
These are just a few tips on how partners of breastfeeding moms can support breastfeeding. Partners play a HUGE role in a successful breastfeeding journey!
Nicholle Bruhn, PNP-PC, CPEN, IBCLC
Omaha Childrens Clinic, PC
19102 Q ST, #102
